enregalia's Blog

I am SICK of the Sausage. Little help???

As you may or may not know, I experienced some hairloss which caused me to have my hair cut off very short.

Today, I took some pictures of myself. I have to say: the haircut makes no difference.

I still like my style, it's only altered.

Felice was right!

TRW~You are a good friend..and know just how to make me feel better.

I ♥ U

8:o)

This is about my cat. He's the second most important living being to me on the planet.

 John Munch has always churlish and not really very cuddly. However, as he aging, he's becoming nuzzley, affectionate and vocal. I wonder why? I love this cat so much...how can something so sweet and innocent really love me as much as he does? He nuzzles me when I wake in  the morning, his meows are gentle and friendly, he knows when I'm not well, or I'm feeling sad or stressed out. A complete turn around from the cat Ive know for a decade...I hope he's not leaving me soon..I hope he's not becoming gentle and sweet because he's gonna die...I would be heartbroken.

Okay I know it's silly...but I l♥ve this animal.

Today has started badly. I cut my finger open on a coffee can, and I have to clean up for the impending visit of a friend. Which I do not want.

I met this man when I was working at Wendy's 8 years ago. He had a romantic interest in me...and I of course turned him down. I mean...he's 60 years old, among other things. He still aims for my heart, and even tries to get me into bed once in a while...uh...no. It's not his age...it's the sour smell of cigarettes and defeat I can't stand. He's also very cranky, and does not listen well. no, he hears, he's just so self interested, he doesn't listen.

She knocked at my door last night around 10.

"We are having a party, and you are most invited." she winks. I swoon. She has violet eyes

I will never get Kate, but I can dream!

Last night I went upstairs for a doob and some socializing. I met my neighbor Danielle's newest roommate, Kate. As soon as she walked in she looked at me and said "you have a beautiful face" I of course thought she meant my new haircut suited me, and left it at that. Kate continues to chat with me, her face like a sexy, mischievous little nymph, full of energy and sparkling wit. She told me two more times i was "awesome"

When I bid farewell to the girls, Kate seemed disappointed. Nearing the door I heard her say "damn damn..she's hot" and her roommates said "you only want what you can't have.

I think I may pursue Kate.

Okay...here's a baby getting a head massage:  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nxCePnGkR2g

and here's a monkey getting a head massage: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G_3zAkNE3Ls&feature=related

Too freaking CUTE..

If i could meet an indian male who gives good Champi, I would be in •○oHeAvEno○•

Watch this little dude massaging this guy's head. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=geLtFCxDs40

Yesterday was the first day of work this season.

I have been shoveling snow now for 4 years. You may ask "why do that kind of work?" I have to admit it is rough work, hard on my physical body. It toughens my muscles and roughens my hands. The salt gets in my eyes and I spend a whole winter with a mean little squint.

The work is lovely. It is somehow very comforting to be in the midst of a storm, and pushing around matter that is more often less tangible...and weighs a ton at that moment. Ti's a miracle. Nature impresses me, even if it is out of whack. To be shoved around and brace against the force, to realize YES I AM here...every muscle straining...I am ALIVE...feeling the force of my own being, however small it seems comparatively, managing, containing this matter, this piece of nature, whom of which MUST be female, to carry on so.

Cathartic.

I'm an OCD sufferer, and as I get older, I tend to get worse. I think when people think OCD they think "neat freak". Not so much. I have a problem with hoarding. I have a REAL problem with it. I have pay stubs from 1995, right up until I stopped working, 5 years ago. news papers, receipts, bottles, batteries. Broken drinking glasses (I'm afraid to put them in the trash for fear they will cut thru the plastic, but I can't use Newspaper to wrap the glass, cause I cannot throw out the newspapers!)

 I compulsively buy bath products, clothing sunglasses and books I'm a real freak with Make-up. I I just counted 13 tubes of mascara, 8 pots of cream blush, 10 of powder blush, 36 different eyeliners and so many pots of Dermablend foundation that the oldest ones are not even a color anymore.

Socks...toe socks bobby socks, Knee socks and thigh highs. hundreds of pairs. Legwarmers...I'm up to 20. Jeans. So many pairs I haven't any idea how many. Boots, shoes, slippers and flipflops.

The absolute worst and the most revolting is the food hoarding. I will buy food...and not fucking eat it.  THATS RIGHT! I buy too much food...and it ends up rotting in the fridge (here's where it gets bad...) I can't bring myself to throw it away!!! WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT?!?!?!

 Not to mention the Worry worry worry...is my hair falling out? Will I have a proper shit today? Is the cat sick, and what if he dies??? Where is the mail? What if the mailman delivers important mail to the wrong address!?!

I haven't the "goat path" in my house for one simple reason: medication. When I can take my anti anxiety meds I have no fear of throwing the stuff away. Even the boxes to pricey face cream (you never know, it may have to be returned) and the umpteen receipts I have (you never know, it may have to be returned!) it SUCKS that I have to medicate myself to do it. I HATE IT.

BUT-I did it...today. I threw alot of stuff away, but I am whacked out of my gourd and drinking too. 

No further evidence is needed to show that 'mental illness' is not the name of a biological condition whose nature awaits to be elucidated, but is the name of a concept whose purpose is to obscure the obvious.

Awesome.

I was expecting to spend the day in a gloomy hotel room with my mister, but he comes and tells me when he brings me breakfast: "Would you like to go to a nice sunny spot today?" I, feeling churlish, thinking he means the backseat of his wife's Beamer said "What, in the car?" (he's been driving it because he's given me the Lincoln and it's in hiding for 6 months)

But No!

HE MEANT HIS LAKE!

I am over-fucking-joyed. I love the sun, I love the water...and he has a Water Trampoline, the clearest, cleanest lake on the pennisula and it's so private, I can be nude all day! 

I will try to sneak a few pics...but I may not be able to...EP and all that's contained within my profile is a secret...if he knew I was posting all those pics...well he'd lose his cool. I am his to look at and noone else (he thinks).

What he doesn't know won't hurt him. ;O)

The other day my daughter and I were in the mall shopping and goofing around. We went into KA|S and I started trying on stiletto heels. I had my silver grey super tight skinnies on, and they looked amazing with these shoes. I have never worn any high heeled shoe EVER..and I'm 32 years old...so at first I was unsure, walking around the store in these black satin strappy spikes. Then..something amazing happened...The woman in me came out. She shoved the sporty Dunks wearing, tomboyish Cass to the side, and stepped into the light...long lean and super tall in those stilettos. I began to strut. I walked up to the salesgirl and put on my Mae West voice...i was making my daughter and the lady laugh :O) I was trying on a red pair, and a man who was apparently watching from the bench in the piazza of the mall, and came into the store...and asked me for my number!!!! Maybe I should buy a pair of heels huh folks?